Lovino x Reader
“Lovino… before I leave, I need to know… Do you love me?” you asked me, bag in hand.
I stood frozen, unable to utter a word. They were there. I swear to you, they were there, screaming in my mind, trying to get out. I wanted to say—
But now you’re walking away. I can feel them in my throat, burning and tearing their way to the surface. I want to scream to you. Tell you to wait. To come back. That I—
Now I’m sitting at the window of the terminal, watching you disappear on the horizon. I’m sure everything thinks I’m crazy. And I am. Because I let you go. Because I couldn’t say it.
I woke with a start, one arm outstretched, trying to grab a hold of something that was no longer there. Tears dripped slowly onto my pillow as I lay there, hoping to God that someone would take my hand, not daring to pull it away, just in case… just in case.
But you didn’t come back. I knew you wouldn’t.
“Please…” I begged to the ceiling. “I do…”
Yet another sleepless night, thinking of you. My stupid boss and little brother won’t stop fussing over me as I burn yet another dish or drop another plate. They insist that I just go home and sleep. They don’t get it. If I sleep, I dream. If I dream, I think of you. Everyone says I’m grumpier than usual and dare to tease me about it being because of a girl. It takes a lot to keep me off of them. They seem offended, asking what’s gotten into me. They don’t understand. What’s not in me is the proper question. My heart.
I go home late- or was it early- time was not a bother to me anymore. I would probably be described as ‘drunk as a horse’ or ‘shit-faced’ by now. As I try to unlock my front door I wonder why the lock got so small that I couldn’t fit the key in. I was in the process of cursing my landlord when it finally slid into place. That click was a small comfort.
Apartment meant bed, which I needed.
“Welcome home…” I could hear you sing.
“I’m home…” I slur, barely managing to close the door before I stumble and collapse against the wall. “I’ll sleep here for tonight…”
I wake the next morning with a throbbing in my head. I can’t see what’s around me but it’s not my house, not where I went to sleep. There is an aspirin, a glass of water and a note on the side table. I down the pill and lay back in bed, not reading the note. Later, when I drag myself out of the covers I realize the door is locked. I finally read the note.
I’m placing you under room arrest Lovino. If you need anything, holler – and don’t forget to be polite. Antonio.
I scream every curse I knew and then proceeded to make up some I must say I was proud of. Afterwards my head wasn’t too happy with me though, and the en-suite toilet and I became good friends.
Almost a week later I’m upgraded to house arrest. I’m sure the maids were so happy with the boss after that. None of them talked to me unless they had to. I overheard many of them saying that I looked horrible when I was brooding. I could recall you pinching my cheek or pulling my ear when I would get bitter. You would call me a list of names in Spanish with that stupid accent of yours.
I guess a maid caught me daydreaming about that and went around telling people about my ‘girlfriend’. I got tired of beating up people by this point. I took to daydreaming in my room only – which brought my sentence back to room arrest of my own accord I guess. Not that I minded.
The boss finally let me come back to work some time later, but I just washed the dishes. He figured that the work would do me good, and it did. For some semblance of time I was able to think of something other than missing you. Though I did not get my hopes up, it was only my first day back working.
The shift started early as I had to catch up from the rush the other day. I recalled, vaguely now, that it had been quite a busy day the moment I met you. My brother had been an idiot as per usual and spilled some sauce on your dress. Antonio sent you to the back as we had developed quite the effective way of cleaning sauce stains. You seemed flustered at first but were very offended and determined when I insulted my brother for his stupidity.
What I do recall clearly was the way my heart jumped to my throat at the sight of your flustered face and the tingling feeling running through me when you got all demanding. Even though I did not believe in it, nor did I want to admit it – I know now that I had fallen in love with you at first sight.
I was woken from my musing when my brother squealed rather loudly out front. Then there was silence. I wondered about what pathetic mistake he had made this time and went back to my cleaning. Even as I did so, I had a feeling that the scream was not one of his fearful, mistake screams. It sounded happy.
I pushed the feeling aside when I heard the door opening to the back.
“What did he spill this time…?” he grumbled, not turning around.
“Your secrets,” sang an angel.
The plate in my hands shattered when it hit the floor. My back was still turned to the door. It was a dream. I was still asleep in bed. Dreaming. Probably drunk again.
I felt someone standing right behind me. This was a very real dream.
“Turn around and say it…” demanded the voice. I felt the tingling run down my spine.
“Say what…?” I was shocked I managed that much. Yet I still had not turned around.
“Do you love me?”
Images flashed through my mind.
Your painful face. Your back to me. The plane flying away. I felt the pain in my heart as I stared into your eyes now. That same pain. The burning in my throat and the screaming in my mind. I had to say it. I couldn’t let you go again. It was just three. Simple. Words—
“I love you!”
And you smiled.